Bad Things Happen To Good People

Bad things happen to good people. They just do. 

First thing I woke up to this morning, before I even wiped the sleep from my eyes or had my coffee, was a whole pot of leftover soup dumped out. On the carpet. 

Bandits. 

Bandits must have broken in here and did this. 

Surely one of my precious angels didn't do this (surely I was delirious). 

As quiet as a church house mouse, Sweet Baby had climbed out of bed and went to work. 

I know it was her because her footed pajamas were smeared with soup and she had Rotel tomatoes in her hair. And let's be honest, who decides to heat up soup for breakfast???

Thanks, Mom, but you can sleep and I'll handle breakfast, you can handle clean up.

See how sweet she is? 

Now let me rewind to yesterday, "Go night night, Roxie. Sweet dreams." 

I laid her down for a nap, but there'd be zero nappage going on. 

She decided that a party would be a better choice. 

It was a poop party. 

Poop all over. 

Poop in her fingernails. 

Poop on her stuffed animals. 

Looked like she was wearing brown leggings - but it was poop. 

You ever had to clean poop off of a spindle crib? It's a chore! 

So, here's a little tip- when you're at Walmart and you see those huge 18-24 month onesies and you think your baby will be too big for onesies at that age, BUY THEM. Buy them all. And as a bonus, you can usually find them on clearance because all the moms think their kid will look like a kindergartener in them. They're right, your tot will look gigantic in them. Who cares? Babies can pull down pants. Babies can take off shorts. Babies can take off bloomers and diaper covers. Babies WILL do that. That's what they do. Snap crotch onesies are a little bit trickier. When it comes to nap time, onesies are a blessing. 

Get 'em. You can thank me later. 

Then after you've had some caffeine and you're your jolly self again, you may find yourself walking through the hallway and notice a pleasant aroma. 

::sniffs hard:: Well, that's a nice change of pace. ::sigh::

Now I'm curious. 

But what is it? That Glade Plug-In has been dried up for weeks now. What is that fabulous smell??? You know cleaning fairies never hit your house, and you're too poor for a maid, so what can it be? 

Well, well, well, what do we have here? A little 2 1/2 foot tall human spraying that new bottle of Windex like its a sport.

On the walls, the toilet, the cabinet, the bathtub, the roll of toilet paper. She was thorough; I'll give her that. 

Gotcha! 

Give me my Windex! ((Removing it from Baby's death grip)) "Thank ya very much for attempting to clean, but that's a no."

Turns out, Rylie WAS cleaning (thank you, sweetie ::kiss kiss::) and Baby ran off with the bottle. 

Toddlers are quick, y'all. 

Like stealthy midgets. 

Let's just take a moment of silence for the moms of twins. 

((God bless you, Laura.))

But it's not all bad, toddlers bring an unimaginable supply of laughter and happiness to a home! 

Their tiny disasters are all worth it! 

It reminds me of a Dolly Parton quote:

"If you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain."

So you're saying toddlers are like rain and the happiness they bring is like the rainbow? Pretty much. 

I try to see the glass as half full, even though the glass is actually empty because Baby dumped that out too. 

Truth is, what would my life be without all the chaos and mayhem? Peaceful, but not what I want. It'd be dull. Boring. Sad. There'd be no fun stories to tell!

My world is loud, messy, crazy and out of control at times. It's not for everyone, but it's just right for me!

God bless this hot mess and the tiny army she has been given. 

Happy Weekend!

❤️ Jenn